OK, let's talk about Cayden, and how he's going to Kindergarten in the fall. I don't really understand when this happened. I specifically remember looking at baby clothes while Cayden was a newborn and glancing at the 2t and 3t things and thinking "my itty bitty baby will never ever be that big." Yeah, well. Last month I looked up and realize my itty bitty baby 5t shirts were too short for him - we're out of the baby section and into the big boys stuff. (On to the pictures. You KNEW there was going to be pictures, right?)
That's Cayden ranging in newborn to, well that picture of him and Eli on the motorcycle was taken today - 4.5 years old. When you think about it, four and a half years isn't that long of a time. But it seems like forever because I really can't really remember what life was like before knowing Cayden - just like I can't really remember what life was like as a Mother to just one child, even though Eli's been here for a little less than two and a half years. There's so much I can't remember, actually. Cayden when he was a baby. Cayden before he could walk. Cayden before he could talk. Oh, I know it happened, and I do have pictures and videos to look back on, but it's still fuzzy in my memory. Still, I also think about the future and I can't imagine him being any different than what it is now. I see kids playing on the playground - unsupervised because they're old enough - and I can't imagine leaving Cayden on the playground alone. The other day we stopped for gas and when Jeremy went in to pay, I watched kids walking home from school - all by themselves again - and I couldn't imagine letting Cayden doing that. And it's not because I'm paranoid or worried. It's just because I can't picture him old enough to be able to do those things. I also watched him stand next to an older boy on the playground today, and the boy was at least a foot taller than him, if not more. I realized some day (and sooner rather than later) Cayden too will be that tall.
He starts kindergarten in the fall. Kindergarten. When the hell did that happen? Kindergarten is when most of my memories started (I mean I can remember some things from before kindergarten, but the details are fuzzy. I very clearly remember things that happened to me in kindergarten.)
We went back and forth with our decision to place Cayden in kindergarten. He won't even be five when school starts, he'll be the youngest kid in his grade, and that makes me very very nervous. He's a boy, and I do believe that most (I did not say all) boys mature more slowly than girls. So. Am I setting him up for something by making him the youngest in his grade?
I'm not worried about him academically at all. There are some areas he could improve in (his pencil grip sucks. Really really sucks.) But he catches on quickly and more importantly, he really loves to learn. I am VERY concerned about his emotional readiness. He still doesn't like to be away from me. He complains about going to school now - and he only goes four days a week for not even four hours. And now you want me to send him five days a week all day?
I was on the fence because of this - I didn't want to send him and have him not be ready. I didn't want to hold him back and have him get bored. Well. Turns out, we don't have a choice. Cayden's school originally told us they thought that since he was so young, we might have the option of having him repeat the grade. As it turns out, we do not. Our choices are to enroll him in Kindergarten or home school him.
I don't want to home school. I'm not against homeschooling or homeschoolers, but have to be a certain kind of person to be a teacher - whether it's in a "regular" school or a home school. I am not that kind of person. Part of it IS selfish. I just don't want to do it. But more than that, I don't think I would do a good job, and I don't want to fail Cayden. STILL, doing it for a year would not kill me and I could and would manage. Except... One of my main concerns is Cayden doesn't like to be away from me, even if it's with Jeremy - if he has to pick between his Dad and I, 9 times out of 10 he will pick me. And I get it. We spend a LOT of time together. I'm with him every day, we even co-sleep with the boys. Being homeschooled by me is not going to help that - if anything it's only going to make things worse.
So. My itty bitty baby who I couldn't imagine wearing 2t clothing is now going to Kindergarten in the fall. I'm incredibly nervous, and constantly wondering if I'm doing the right thing. I keep trying to remind myself that we always have the option of pulling him out of school if things don't go well, and that eventually I'm going to have to let him grow up and I'll probably never think he's really ready. So. Here we go, I guess.
In our area, you have to be 5 by September 1 to go to kindergarten. My boy turned 5 on August 30. He is always the youngest in the class. He typically celebrates his birthday the first week of school, then the following weeks kids are turning the next number older. I had the same concerns. He was bright enough, size-wise he was comparable, and he had been in daycare so he was ready socially. He is now heading toward the end of third grade. He has had issues with paying attention, but I think it's because he already knows the topic so he starts to daydream and then misses the instructions or whatever is next and then finds himself in trouble.
ReplyDeleteNo one knows your kid better than you. If you think he's ready, go for it! mum
When I entered school, kids with an October birthday had the option to go ahead or wait another year. With my oldest brother, my Mom held him back based on boys maturing more slowly than girls. He was one of the oldest in his class, but he never had any issues. With me, my Mom sent me to kindergarten at 4 and I did well in school. I think the only time I didn't handle it well emotionally is when I entered middle school. There are many reasons for it, it was the first time I didn't walk to school and had to take a bus, it's when most kids started to swear, the first time I wore a bra and in general it was a lot of change to take at 10 years old. I don't think I was alone in having a hard time adjusting to middle school.
ReplyDeleteI was surprised to read that kindergarten is an all day thing for you. In my day it was only a half day and that adjustment from spending every minute with my Mom to spending 4 hours at school was much easier.
Where i live in canada kindergarten is only half time. Either half a day of a full day every other day.
ReplyDeleteSchool cut off per grade is December 31st so with my son birthday in November he is younger than the rest too. He is very big and tall now though and i never worried about him being younger.
You don't want him being almost a full year older and being "too" ready down the road and getting real bored.
In all reality you guys are the parents and know what you feel is best for your child. that is still 5 months away and he can be much more ready.
Where I am in ontario Canada my son will start junior kindergarten this September. He just turned 4 in march. And the school hell globe going to is all day everyday kindergarten. Most schools are introducing this this year.
ReplyDeleteI thought in most states, you had to be 5 by the time school started? I know in California they are in the process of doing that. Before, the cut off date was like December 5 or something. Also, I have heard of some programs like pre-K or even Junior Kindergarten. Do you have those programs?
ReplyDeleteYeah, around here kids need to be 5 by September 1. Also, kindergarten in public schools is only 1/2 days (3 hours)unless you enroll your child in a specific class reserved for full-time, and then you have to pay for the extra time. Our preschool programs typically offer 2 year programs where kids go from between 3 & 4, and 4 & 5. Interesting how different states can have such varied program standards. If you don't think he's ready for all-day kindergarten by the time fall rolls around, maybe another preschool program will be available in your area that offers the age-range you'd need; many quality programs still have a couple of slots left in early September when you'd need it, and they teach a lot of the same things that kindergarten does. Change is always hard at first for loving parents and their children - even when it brings positive growth. Letting our babies grow up is the hardest, most bittersweet part of parenting. If anybody knows how to make it easier, please let me in on it asap. I've been doing this for quite a few years now, and experience hasn't made it any less emotional.
ReplyDeleteForgot to mention that the Halloween background Cayden is posing against in his Batman costume is great; where did you go to/find that? Adorable pictures of your babies.
ReplyDeleteSorry guys, I didn't mean to take so long to respond but it's been crazy per usual.
ReplyDeleteThe thing is, I'm not worried about him at all academically. My Aunt who is a preschool teacher tells me he's already ahead of where he needs to be, and while I think he is behind in a couple of things, I also know that's normal (no kid is going to excel at EVERYTHING) and we have plenty of time to get him at least on par. His emotional maturity is where I'm worried. He makes friends easily, but he still handles some things in a way that reminds me of just how young he is. And he doesn't like to be away from me. So, we have pretty much his whole life spent with me, up until this last year where he spends all his time minus four days where he spends 3.5 hours away from me, then he has all summer with me (we're trying to find him a day program to get in too, but that stuff is so expensive and it's hard to figure out schedules when I'll have the four kids and two naps to consider) and the BOOM! He's making this change.
Anyway, I was worried until today. I went with him on his class trip to a museum. He begged me to go, and I had to rearrange some things to make sure I could (tell the kids I sit for I couldn't do it.) I went, he left and hung out with his friends, and when I asked him to come over by me, he waved me off! So I think he'll be alright.
And the Halloween background is a background from JC Penney's portrait studio. We went for his three year pictures, he took that one picture, told the photographer "I'm done" and walked out and refused to take any more.